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Science of Motherhood: Monday Quotes #34

 I am conducting scientific research utilizing my family as test subjects and my messy house as my observation field. It’s been awhile since I featured a Monday Quote but today, I couldn’t resist the...

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Things I Wish My Kids Would Learn

I’m pretty sure my kids are not going to grow up to be complete morons. Along the way, my goal as a parent is to teach them stuff. Important stuff. Unfortunately, some of that learning is taking longer...

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You Will Be All Alone: Monday Quotes #35

We are going out and you can’t come. You will be all alone! For whatever reason, my little girl takes great satisfaction in telling me that when Daddy takes her and her big brother somewhere without...

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My Filthy Little Hobo

When I pick the kids up from daycare, they are usually playing in the playground. It’s very sweet the way they come racing, full-speed, down the hill, arms open wide, yelling “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!” I...

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Why I’m Wearing 1 Sock

I have taken to wearing a single sock around the house lately. Ask me why. You: Why are you wearing 1 sock? Me: Because I am getting old. Yes folks, I wear one sock because I am getting old. I …...

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Overheard in the Back Yard

Girl: You have a penis. Ha ha ha ha ha. Boy: You don’t have a penis. Only boys have a penis. Girl: I have two bums and you only have one. Na na na na boo boo. Boy: Girls don’t … Continue reading →

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I Don’t Need You Mommy

We are continuing to fail at potty training our little girl on a daily basis. However, the other night while playing outside with the kids, she announced that she was going inside to go to the potty...

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Stuff I Didn’t Write #1

It’s Monday and I’m tired. My little girl woke up coughing at 5:00am and vomited all over her bed and me. When the cough meds finally kicked in, she was too awake to go back to sleep. So I didn’t …...

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